Strange Instructions Or: How I Stop Caring And Just Laugh At Them

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In today’s world of sue-happy people, governments and companies can’t help but play safe by providing all sorts of crazy disclaimers and instructions that would make Captain Obvious proud. Of course, it’s just a matter of time before they would commit laughable bloopers. They may say that they only “erred on the side of caution” but I don’t really care as long as they are amusing enough.

Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth. – On the label of a bottled drink.

Not for weight control. – On a pact of Breath Savers

Caution: Remove infant before folding. – On a child’s stroller

Theft of this container is a crime. – On a milk crate

Fans of Star Wars will definitely appreciate the irony out of this:

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Warning: High in Sodium – On a packet of salt

Do not use in shower. – On a hair dryer.

Open bottle before drinking – On a bottle of rum

STOP! This is the last rung – On a ladder

Caution: Hot beverages are hot – On a takeaway coffee cup

Warning: Do not insert finger – On a blender

Remove plastic before eating – On a snack bar wrapper

Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth. – On a novelty rock garden set called “Popcorn Rock.”

Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you. – On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rearview mirror.

Noted.

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Beware of people – Sign in a street in Hong Kong

Safe for use around pets – On a packet of kitty litter

May cause drowsiness – On bottle of sleeping pills

Warning: Physical activities can be dangerous. – On a playground in Hong Kong 

Not suitable for children 36 months or less. – On a 1-year-old’s birthday card

Caution: Do not use to strike any solid objects – On a handle of a hammer

Keep out of reach of children and teenagers. – On a can of air freshener

Caution: Ice cream is cold. – On a tub of ice cream

For proper food safety and quality, use the following directions: do not eat pizza without cooking. – On a supermarket pizza 

It’s a dangerous world. Be careful out there.

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My name Edmark M. Law. I work as a freelance writer, mainly writing about science and mathematics. I am an ardent hobbyist. I like to read, solve puzzles, play chess, make origami and play basketball. In addition, I dabble in magic, particularly card magic and other sleight-of-hand type magic. I live in Hong Kong. You can find me on Twitter` and Facebook. My email is edmarklaw@learnfunfacts.com

30 thoughts on “Strange Instructions Or: How I Stop Caring And Just Laugh At Them

    1. Lol 🙂

      However,, there are some leaves that can cause injury then they hit someone like from palm trees or coconut trees. Several years ago, my friend was hit by a falling coconut tree leaf (the whole leaf) and it caused some minor concussion. But he’s lucky considering that the coconut which also fell didn’t hit him!

      Like

  1. I recently bought a kitchen knife set as a gift for daughter’s upcoming birthday. Since I ordered online, I opened the box when it arrived to make sure everything was as it should be. I laughed out loud at the warning on the side of the knife box: “Caution! Contains sharp objects.” Well, duh, they’d better be sharp, I paid good money for them!

    Liked by 1 person

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