How Blogging Saved My Marriage

Miscellanea, , , , 58 Comments

This is a guest post by Dominique Nancy.

I thought how I got into Blogging might make some of you laugh.

Two years ago, I was concerned that my husband’s online gaming might mess up our marriage. We all know how excessive virtual worlds can have real-world influences on health, spouse happiness, and sex life? But can lingerie help save marriages when men’s gaming habits have interfered with the couple’s bedtime? As a scientific journalist with a strong interest for fashion, I asked myself this question and made it the subject of a study (Yep, I did carry out the experiments described below… Oh yes, with a truly scientific approach). 🙂

Resume

The study confirms that multiplayer video games can have negative consequences on marital satisfaction. The results shed light on the effects of a woman wearing lingerie on a role-playing gamer spouse, studied this way for the first time (to my knowledge). The results also suggest that women can easily be overshadowed by the game The Elder Scrolls Online and hockey, even the most boring hockey match.

Methodology

For the study, I have conducted three experiments in an attempt to seduce my husband (read: the laboratory rat) in order to get him away from his computer screen and into our bed. These experiments were carried out between October 2015 to April 2016. Two of them were engaged while my hubby was role-playing the game The Elder Scrolls Online. One was undertaken while he was watching on T.V. a hockey game involving Les Canadiens, his number one team. (Previous research has found that men may prefer gaming and watching hockey over having sex with their spouse)¹. Experiments were done using two different types of lingerie from two brands: a Blue Lace Babydoll from Roselle (see the picture of 3C Style below) and a Delicate Nude Lace Bra with matching Panties from Anine Bing. One experiment which served as a control was undertaken using a white Body Towel Wrap from HSN.

Note: One more experiment was conducted in December 2017 to confirm or infirm the data of the original study and see if the marital satisfaction had changed over time. It involved the researcher (me) sending a photo of herself wearing the Nova Bra and Panties by the British brand Bluebella (THE provocative and naughty lingerie items you see everywhere on Instagram). This seductive set was bought at Alice Kass’s Pop Up shop in Montreal (Rockland Shopping Center – open until the 18th January). The pic was sent to the subject (husband/laboratory rat) while he was in India for a conference.

Data (The Great Seduction)

Experiments

Conduct 1: Showing up in hubby’s office with a white Body Towel Wrap (as I was just getting out of the shower). The subject was gaming and very much concentrated in killing some zombies and demons.

image002

Reactions from the subject (verbal and non-verbal behavior):

  • Shows a surprise face (eyebrows are raised)
  • Smiles (about 10 seconds)
  • Turns his eyes back on the screen while emitting the sound “Grrrr…”
  • Speaks to spouse (without looking at her): “Sorry darling! It’s crucial right now. My team players need me!” 
  • The subject kept playing and came to bed… Three hours later!  Note: Spouse did pretend to sleep.

Conduct 2: As above but wearing the Blue Lace Babydoll from Roselle.

image004

Reactions from the subject (verbal and non-verbal behavior):

  • Shows a big smile (about 20 seconds) but…
  • Seems quizzical and in doubt (only one eyebrow raised);
  • Looks intensely at spouse (probably trying to figure out if I will be mad or not if he did not follow me to the bedroom);
  • chuckles (slightly nervous, 5 seconds)
  • Turns his eyes back on the computer screen;
  • Speaks to spouse (who’s walking away): “It won’t be long, honey!” 
  • The subject kept playing and came to bed one hour and a half later (sign of progress).

Conduct 3: Showing up in the living room wearing comfortable and sexy underwear (Delicate Nude Lace Bra and Panties) from Anine Bing while the subject is watching a hockey game. Note: The Canadiens team were losing with no chance to win at all.

 image005

Reactions from the subject (verbal and non-verbal behavior):

  • Shows a big smile (about 20 seconds);
  • Giggle (loudly, 20 seconds);
  • Thighs slapped;
  • Looks at spouse for a minute with a smirk and puppy eyes;
  • Turn his head back toward the T.V. screen;
  • Speaks to spouse (who’s rolling her eyes): “It’s almost over!” 
  • The subject kept watching the match and came to bed about 40 minutes later.

Conduct 4: Sent a pic of myself wearing Bluebella provocative lingerie to my hubby while he was away for work in a foreign country.

image007

Reactions from the subject (according to him):

  • Very happy;
  • Timing was good apparently;
  • The photo helped subject release some stress. (Glad to do that for you darling! Thanks to the technology.)

Results and Analysis

Overall the researcher found that beautiful lingerie can help marital satisfaction and love life. But online gaming and hockey (and presumably other televised sports) are major factors to consider, both may lead to dissatisfaction when one partner spends too much time at it. Killing zombies and demons can definitely have some effects on your relationship with your partner. Further research is needed to confirm this hypothesis.

Conclusion

The data from these experiments seem to confirm the results of a study published in the Journal of Leisure Research which shows that “couples who did not go to bed at the same time reported less marital satisfaction”.² Researcher will gladly buy more beautiful lingerie, especially from Alicia Kass Shop as the items bought there had the biggest impact on the subject. Need to remind you though that in the fourth experiment the subject was not participating in an online game nor watching a hockey game. Also, the researcher was not able to see the subject’s level of arousal. However, the spouse’s satisfaction level in the last experiment had increased considerably since the time of the first experiment. While the researcher could not deduce from this study the specific reason for it, she speculated that blogging may be related to it. Indeed, since she started engaging with the wonderful WordPress community (July 2016) she goes to sleep quite late at night and in result does not have to wait no more for her hubby to come to bed. This situation tends to have decreased the level of frustration. But it may have inverted the problem…

Note: Researcher thinks she has just scratched the surface of this new type of research. She hopes in a near future to be able to produce more solid results. In the meantime, she’ll keep blogging! (Hubby tells me he would gladly participate in additional experiments.)

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank Darren Sleep who’s Bus Papers… part one and two inspired me for this post and for reviewing it. (He tells me he had to have a cold shower and a lie down afterward.) Thanks to my husband for his great sense of humour and -despite the truth of the facts presented here- for authorizing me to publish my results. Finally, a big thank you to Anine Bing, Bluebella and Alicia Kass for making available such beautiful lingerie.

References

  1. California University Study (2010, cited by Dutka, PS3 News,“Study: Chemically, Men Prefer Gaming Over Sex”).
  2. Brigham Young University Study (2012, cited by Sifferlin, Time Healthland,“Is Online Gaming Messing Up Your Marriage?”).

Dominique Nancy is a French scientific journalist and fashion blogger from Montreal, Canada. On her blog, 3C Style, she shares her interest in sustainable fashion and style through her discoveries. Every now and then she also shares with a touch of humour her thoughts about specific topics related to the world around her, as well as her own trials and learnings. 

 

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58 thoughts on “How Blogging Saved My Marriage”

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      1. Well that is a fabulous length of time… however, we won’t be receiving medals for long service at the end will we 🙈😂 so what we must do along the way, is make sure we don’t lose ourselves.
        I do plan a post about marriage in fact … xxx

        Liked by 1 person

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