Pun of the Weak: Some Little Johnny Jokes #2

Teacher: Johnny, please give an example of an animal that travels long distances? Little Johnny: My goldfish. It travels around the globe. 😂😂😂 The history teacher was discussing the disadvantages of war and the importance of peace. When she asked whom of them are against wars, all of her students raised their hands. “Johnny, can […]

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Pun of the Weak: Vision

Interviewer: How do you see yourself next year in our company? Applicant: I can’t see that far… I don’t even have a 20/20 vision. (Note: Forgive me for using this overused pun as this is my last chance to do so.)

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Pun of the Weak: Riddles

Q: How can a cheetah change its spots? A: By moving. Q: The beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of every end, and the end of every place. A: 2.718281828… Q: The maker doesn’t need it, the buyer doesn’t want it, and the owner doesn’t know he has it. What […]

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Pun of the Weak: A Few Pebbles of Wisdom

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are stupider than that.” — George Carlin, Doin’ It Again, 1990 “There are four dimensions to most things we buy these days: length, width, height, and debt.” — Anon., The Fifth Wheel, Vol. 33, January 1977 “There’s nothing wrong with being shallow as long […]

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Pun of the Weak: Cookbook

“The cookbook is being compiled. Please submit your favourite recipe and a short antidote concerning it.” — Richard Lederer  

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Pun of the Weak: Camera

“Someone handed me a picture and said, ‘This is a picture of me when I was younger.’ Every picture of you is when you were younger. ‘Here’s a picture of me when I’m older.’ Where’d you get that camera, man?” — Mitch Hedberg

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Pun of the Weak: Broken English

Thomas Hood Thomas Hood, a 19th-century author and poet, once related a story about an editor of a new morning newspaper asking an Alderman what he thought of his paper. “I like it a lot,” the Alderman replied, “though it contains several broken English.” The editor was confused so he told him to elaborate. “Why […]

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Pun Of The Weak: Dating

Two elderly gentlemen were shooting the breeze. “I guess you’re never too old,” the first one boasted. “Why just yesterday a pretty college girl said she’d be interested in dating me. But to be perfectly honest, I don’t quite understand it.” “Well,” said his friend, “you have to remember that nowadays women are more aggressive. They don’t mind being […]

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Pun Of The Weak: Here’s Looking At Euclid

Higgledy-piggledy Euclid Geometer Pained by the asking of “What is the use Studying the doctrines so Axiomatical?” Answered acutely, “Oh, Don’t be obtuse!” — Anthony Harrington

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